And Baby Makes Three

December 1, 2006
That two-thirds of couples with young children are very unhappy with their marriages makes these advice books timely and useful. In "Babyproofing", the lighter of the two, young wives, mothers, and friends Cockrell, Cathy O'Neill, and Julia Stone share their experiences and collective wisdom. Their work reads like Vicki Iovine's popular "Girlfriends' Guide" serieschatty, engaging, and full of firsthand advice. Chapters cover common issues, e.g., divvying up tasks, handling changes in sexual activity, and dealing with grandparents while also offering "Solutions," usually divided into "For Both," "For Women," and "For Men"; most chapters have "How Women Feel" and "How Men Feel" sections.

For those who prefer scientific research and solutions, "And Baby Makes Three" offers a more clinical approach to fortifying a marriage once a baby enters the picture. Psychologists John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman (coauthors, "Ten Lessons To Transform Your Marriage") wrote this volume based on their studies of parents and the results of a "Bringing Baby Home" program they have developed for new and expecting parents. Beyond just citing research studies and statistics, the Gottmans provide readers with self-tests and detailed exercises for examining and resolving particular issues within their own marriages. The psychological terminology may make the text daunting for some readers, but the applications are wonderfully practical and specific. Furthermore, the book offers more detail than does "Babyproofing", e.g., the analysis of conflict is broken down into nine brief chapters. Ultimately, the Gottmans' work is so practical that it will apply to all married readers, whether or not they are raising children. Larger public libraries, especially those with dedicated parenting sections, should purchase both books; smaller libraries should purchase only the Gottmans' work.Erica L. Foley, Flint P.L., MI

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