Heck: Where the Bad Kids Go

Starred review from June 30, 2008
In his uproarious send-up of all things purgatorial, debut novelist Basye gives readers a new lease on afterlifes. Milton, a blameless 11-year-old bookworm, and his “blue-haired, thirteen-going-on-thirty-year-old” sister, Marlo, are at the Mall of Generica (in Generica, Kans.), when they meet their demise in a ludicrous accident (Milton's nemesis plants a stick of dynamite in a 20-foot-tall statue made from marshmallow: “Smoke, noise, and burning marshmallow fused together to create a sickeningly sweet moment, one that was both ridiculously tragic and tragically ridiculous”). Unfortunately, Marlo has been shoplifting and stashed her goods in Milton's gear, so both get sent to Heck—a hell for the under-18 demographic. Never mind that Milton is technically innocent: “The devil's in the details,” snaps Heck's principal, Bea “Elsa” Bubb. After a series of ill-fated yet deliciously documented attempts to escape, one sibling succeeds in returning from the Underworld, but the finale is almost beside the point. The author's umpteen clever allusions—characters' eternal fates are decided by standardized “Soul Aptitude Tests”; Mr. R. Nixon teaches ethics to evildoers in room 1972—make this book truly sparkle. Ages 9–12.

September 1, 2008
Gr 6-8-Quintessential good-kid Milton Fauster knows all about his sister Marlo's life of petty crime. So, when they are both killed in a freak marshmallow explosion, he isn't surprised that she doesn't qualify for Heaven, but he's shocked to find that he isn't going there either. They end up in Heck, an unearthly reform school that isn't quite Hell, but certainly not a place anyone would want to stay in "for all eternityor until they turn 18, whichever comes first." Principal Bea "Elsa" Bubb figures that there is something irregular about Milton's soul contract and keeps a close eye on him. Milton, meanwhile, plans to escape. During a dreary class, he meets Virgil, who has a map of the Nine Circles of Heck. Unfortunately, the only way out is through the sewer pipes, literally "down the toilet." The torments of the darned are described in vivid and often grotesque detail. Errant toddlers nap in gingerbread coffins while Boogeypeople read them Edgar Allan Poe. Milton and company make two graphically described voyages through the underworld plumbing. There are numerous classical and historical allusions, many of which will sail over the heads of the intended audience. ("I have an ax to grind with you," snarls home-economics teacher Lizzie Borden, after giving the celery 40 whacks.) In the end, the clever, if somewhat disturbing premise is overwhelmed by slow pacing and relentless descriptions of garbage, sewage, and other heckishly unpleasant things."Elaine E. Knight, Lincoln Elementary Schools, IL"

Copyright 2008 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

June 1, 2008
Welcome to Grizzly Mall: Home of the States Second-Largest Bear-Themed Marshmallow Statue! Such is the Kansas-fed, white-bread suburb 13-year-old Marlo Faustus longs to escape. And escape she does, with her unwitting, innocent younger brother, Milton, when said sculpture explodes, and they arrive, newly deceased, in Heck--where the bad kids go. Puns and allusions abound, enough to sate the corniest appetite, even if many will slide right by thereader: the kids limbo is ruled by one Bea Elsa Bubb, Principal of Darkness, and faculty include Mr. Nixon (ethics), Lizzie Borden (home ec), and Mr. Dior (fashion, though his sole offense appears to be that he is effete). Beneath the jocular surface, though, Marlo and Milton work through a complex sibling relationship on their quest for escape. Can they put aside their differences to elude the Boogeypeople and hall demonitors free the jarred blobs of lost souls, hatch a getaway, and stay together? Heck if I know.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2008, American Library Association.)

January 1, 2009
After eleven-year-old Milton Fauster and his kleptomaniac sister die in a marshmallow explosion at the mall, they find themselves in Heck, an Underworld reform school. Principal Bea "Elsa" Bubb thwarts their escape attempts; only blameless Milton makes it out. Though some of the many clever allusions will likely go over their heads, readers will doubtless respond to the story's overall humor.

(Copyright 2009 by The Horn Book, Incorporated, Boston. All rights reserved.)